February 20, 2005

Two Feet From Each Other, Worlds Apart

I like the guys I work with. There are 3 guys on my team that I really get along with. Except for one TINY detail. They have no idea that I prefer the company of men (and not in that "let's drink Bud Lite and watch sports and hitch up our pants" kind of way... more of a "let's get Martinis and take off our shirts and dance in a big room while mocking people's shoes and shamelessly compare ourselves to the girls on Sex and the City" kind of way.)
Which is fine. I'm not about to scream that I'm a homo. It's completely irrelevant in the work environment. Besides, we've already as a group chosen who we collectively hate and want to mock, and, for the first time since High School, it isn't me.
I'm not pretending to be straight, I just haven't come right out and said anything.
But then for some reason Gabrielle Union came up. Something to do with her hotness factor.

Dan: Oh, you mean the head cheerleader from Bring It On.

Other Guy: What? I mean the chick from Bad Boys II.

Dan: But she was the head black cheerleader in Bring It On.

Other Guy: I've never seen that movie.

Dan: It's really funny.

Different Guy: Dude, hot chicks in cheerleading outfits.

Dan: (Now Supressing Urge to Quote "Do you know what this means? My entire cheerleading career has been a lie!") Um, yeah.

Third Guy: Really. Hot. You thought that movie was funny?

Dan: Really funny. (to Other Guy) I can't believe you haven't seen it. It's awesome.

Awkard Sience. And...Scene.


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