March 17, 2005


OK first and foremost, I'll say it again: There never was any little girl in my apartment. It was all part of a contest. So thanks for all of your concern, but please remember to read blogs from the bottom up.
In other news (man, I need to find a new segue phrase), Yesterday I finally got fed up with my building. The smoke alarm in the hall has been beeping since the fire last year (oh the irony). There has been a pile of wooden moldings in the 2nd floor hallway for almost 6 months. The light in the doorway is burned out. I know that at least one other resident wrote a letter to no avail, so I decided what this situation needed was a little Dan.

Dan: (On phone with Building Company) Hi. I'm a resident, and I wanted to talk to you about our building. I'm not trying to cause trouble, but the smoke alarm has been beeping for months, and there has been a pile of wooden moldings in the 2nd floor hall since the dawn of time.
Nice Building Co. Lady: ...
Dan: Hello?
Nice Lady: Um, I guess you didn't hear. Your super died on saturday. He's been hospitalized for 6 months.
Dan: Uh... (and herein lies the longest most excruciating pause in a telephone call of my entire life)... I guess that explains why he didn't take care of that, huh?
Nice Lady: Yes it does.
Dan: Okaaaay then, I'll, um, be sure to tell my fellow residents. Gottagothanksbye.

So I felt like the world's biggest asshole for a minute. And then I thought: 6 months?! They couldn't find someone to temp in that time? I was unemployed for a month and could have done it!

Epilogue: Upon telling Caroline this story, she made the Oh So New York Move of asking "Did he live in the building? Cause S (her Boyfriend) would so take the apartment. Call and ask if he did."
Yes, because I want to follow up bitching about a dead man with benefiting callously from his death.


Blogger Bathroom Reading said...

My favorite court case ever was a contracts case. Yes, contracts. A guy agreed with an old lady that he would pay her rent "until she died," and in return, he would get her apartment. She was in her 70s at the time.

She lived to something like 96.

The case came about because he died before she did, and she was suing his estate to continue the rent payments, because, after all, she was still alive.

She won.

10:23 AM  

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